Barriers
to effective communication
1. Criticising
2. Name-calling Judging
3. Diagnosing
Sender
Message Receiver
Sender
Feedback
Message
Receiver
Message
4. Praising objectively
5. Ordering
6. Threatening
7. Moralising Sending
solutions
8. Excessive/inappropriate
questioning
9. Advising
10. Diverting
11. Logical argument Avoiding
other concerns
12. Reassuring
More
barriers to effective communication
Our personal ‘cages -
People
have different perceptions of
words and actions
Filtering information -
Hearing
only what you want to hear
Emotions blurring the
message - Responding
to body language
No common language being spoken
-
Use
of jargon
Conflicting verbal and
non-verbal messages
-
Ingnoring
information that conflicts with
what we know
Comparing this person to
others - Evaluating
the source of the information
Reading the other person’s
mind - Looking
for personal agenda
Rehearsing what you are
going to say
-
Not
responding to questions
Judging - Determining
your response before reviewing
evidence
Identifying with the other
person’s problems
-
Demonstrating
some bias
Rescuing - Asking
leading questions
Sparring - Asking
antagonising questions
Being right - Not
being open to other views
Blocking
phrases – road blocks to communication
1. Ordering, directing,
commanding
-
You
take this
- You
get me the ball
2. Warning, threatening
- If
you do that one more time I’ll send you
off
- Okay,
now you’ve had it
3. Preaching, moralising
- Some
people never seem to know when
to stop
- I
wish somebody would teach you a bit
more respect
4. Advising
- Why
don’t you try and play the game?
- How
about getting your players on side?
5. Judging, criticising,
blaming
- I
would have though you would have known
better
6. Name calling, ridiculing,
shaming
- You
clumsy idiot
- You
ought to be ashamed of yourself
7. Interpreting,
psychoanalysing, assuming
-
How
come you’re so penalty prone?
- You
were just trying to get back at me for
what I did last game
8. Teaching, instructing
- How
would you like it if someone did that
to you?
- I
wonder if you know how much that annoys
me
9. Rescuing, intervening
- I
guess I’ll have to stop you doing that
- You’ll
look ridiculous to everyone if you
make that error again
10. Expecting too much
- It’s
so obvious that you should read your
rule book
- Other
players remember to plan things
before they do them
More
blocking phrases
Which of these phrases would you commonly use and how often would you
use them?
1.
No
2.
Can’t (with a shake of the head and an air of finality)
3.
That’s the silliest thing I’ve ever heard
4.
Yeah, but if you did that – (poses extreme or unlikely result)
5.
Our business is different. You can’t do that here
6.
Our system isn’t set up to do it that way
7.
We tried that years ago
8.
Look, you can’t teach an old dog new tricks
9.
That’s not in our area
10.
We’ve done all right so far, why do we need to do this now?
11.
I don’t see anything wrong with the way we are doing it now
12.
That doesn’t sound too practical. Or That sounds too theoretical
13.
We’ve never done anything like that before
14.
You’re talking about changing the whole way we do things!
15.
Let’s not get off on a tangent
16.
Let’s get back to reality
17.
We’ve got a deadline to meet, we don’t have time to fool around
18.
It’s too expensive to do it that way
19.
It’s not in the budget
20.
They will never buy it
21.
Let’s take that up some other time
22.
Are you kidding?
23.
Let’s set up a committee to look at it. Or We’ll deal with it
next meeting
24.
We’ll be a joke if we follow this path
25.
I’ve got the whistle
26. I’m
the boss
